Finding your voice

detail of tryptique

Blue tree tryptique

I used to try to paint like artists I admired. It depended on the week or the season, or the book I had just bought. Sometimes I used lots of color- or none, other times I tried straight, rigid lines- or I just poured the paint on. I think I tried just about every style but it never seemed quite right. For one thing I got bored and could never do two in a row in the same style. After a while I started to "just doodle" with paint or crayons. I found that my doodles were always quite similar, this was the same with my free paintings when I wasn't copying the Artist of the Day. I tried very hard to stop painting and doodling in the same way all the time. I always found my work over-busy. I began to correct my busy paintings by painting over some parts, this gave them breathing space and I was a little more satisfied. But I still had that voice inside that always said "I wish I could paint like so and so".

En francais

Avant, j'essayais de peindre comme les artistes que j'admirais. Selon le jour de la semaine, la saison ou le livre d'art du moment, j'adaptais mon style. Parfois j'utilisais beaucoup de couleur ou pas, des lignes rigides ou des sceaux de peinture, j'ai tout essaye. Je n'arrivais jamais a faire deux peintures du meme style, cela m'ennuyait. Apres un certain temps j'ai commence a peindre et a dessiner tres librement "un peu n'importe quoi". Je trouvais que mes essais libres se ressemblaient tous, ca m'irritait et je m'efforcais a faire d'une autre maniere, sans succes. J'ai commencais a corriger mes peintures en peignant par dessus certaines parties ce qui les ameliora. Mais dans ma tete j'avais toujours la petite voix qui voulait "peindre comme untel".

When I began quilting in 2007, it gave me the idea to start cutting up my paintings because I only liked certain parts of them. It also gave me the freedom to paint because I knew I would be cutting to reassemble anyway so there was no risk, no huge white canvas I was probably going to ruin! Without this fear I was able to increase my production and in doing so I began to see my work emerge. The same shapes, colors, and composition keep seeping in. I am incapable of doing it differently. I am at a point right now where I am beginning to accept the fact that this "style" of painting is in fact my own voice, whether I like it or not. I've seen the image in the mirror and have discovered it's me.

En francais

Quand j'ai commence le patchwork/quilting en 2007 j'ai eu l'idee de decouper mes toiles, de toute facon je n'aimais que certaines parties. C'etait une veritable liberation car je savais que j'allais les decouper et les rassembler pour ensuite les coudre. Il n'y avait aucun risque, je n'allais pas gacher ma belle toile vierge. Cela avait pour resultat une augmentation de ma production, j'ai commence a voir les memes formes, couleurs et compositons emerger. Je suis incapable de faire autrement, j'arrive a un stade ou j'accepte ce "style" de peinture qui est en fait ma propre voix, que j'aime ou pas. Je vois l'image dans la glace et c'est moi.

Quantity vs. Quality

My mountain

We've discovered throughout the years that when it comes to many things, quality beats quantity hands down. Spend better, buy less. One hour of quality time with a child is, they say, more beneficial than 8 hours of just plain old time. Even when it comes to exercise they're saying "10 minutes of the Powerplate is worth an hour of ordinary exercise".

But what about with our art? Do we need to do less to be able to produce better work? Should we plan down to the last details so as to be assured it will come out right?

At the moment I am reading a book called Art & Fear by David Bayles and Ted Orland. It's an excellent book I would recommend to all. When talking about uncertainty the authors give several examples of artists throughout the ages from Tolstoy to Ansel Adams who produced an astounding amount of work, much of it for the bin. Tolstoy re-wrote War and Peace eight times and was still revising as it rolled onto the press. Photographer Jerry Uelsmann once gave a slide lecture of every single photo he made in the span of one year, he judged only 10 pieces acceptable, the rest were destroyed.

The authors go on to talk about perfection and the following example brilliantly illustrates what we should be doing as artists. P. 29 "The ceramics teacher announced on opening day that he was dividing the class into two groups. All those on the left side of the studio, he said, would be graded solely on the quantity of work they produced, all those on the right solely on its quality. His procedure was simple: on the final day of class he would bring in his bathroom scales and weigh the work of the "quantity" group: fifty pounds of pots rated an "A", forty pounds a "B", and so on. Those being graded on "quality" however, needed to produce only one pot- albeit a perfect one- to get an "A". Well, came grading time and a curious fact emerged: the works of highest quality were all produced by the group being graded for quantity. It seems that while the "quantity" group was busy churning out piles of work- and learning from their mistakes- the "quality" group had sat theorizing about perfection, and in the end had little more to show for their efforts than grandiose theories and a pile of dead clay".

As for myself, I have spent countless hours "thinking " about what I want to create, how it should look, my mind racing with expectations while my hands sit idle. I have also lamented at creating piles and piles of stuff for the bin, but after having read Art & Fear I really think the stacks are worth it. Maybe I will find the gem in my trash mountain.

Don't fall in love with your quilt!

We've heard it before, don't become enamored with your work or a part thereof because you won't dare to make necessary changes. I've been trying to follow this advice with my composition. This morning I did some things I have never inflicted upon a quilt, I sloshed acrylic medium on it, and glued some of the fabrics together. This is new for me since I have some set ideas such as fabric is sewn and paper alone is glued. I also painted some fusible interfacing and fused it to the fabric. I now must decide if I should quilt it or leave as is. It's always a struggle to know when there's enough.

EQ6 definitely not GPS

My amazing map from my EQ6 quilting software has turned out less amazing than I had anticipated. I woke up this morning very reassured because I knew I had a plan, all I needed to do was execute. What a myth! I composed all day long on my wall, this after having spent all day yesterday composing on EQ6 and photo shop! I recorded various possibilities with each change of fabric. This was very helpful when I transferred the images to photo shop to have a look at them cropped and on a gray scale.

One of the reasons I wasn't able to execute my plan according to the composition done on EQ6 is that I didn't have all of the chosen fabrics. When I tried to substitute for the fabric I had, the color wasn't right. Still, I feel the time I spent composing with the software was worth it. It really helped me see "the big picture." I had a value composition where I was able to forget the details.

Tomorrow I'll see if I can piece one of these compositions. I still haven't decided which.

En francais

J'ai essaye un logiciel de quilting qui s'appelle Electric Quilt. Apres pas mal d'heures d'apprentissage, j'ai reussi a faire une composition qui me plaisait. Je me suis reveillee le lendemain, rassuree qui j'avais enfin un plan. La composition pour moi est l'aspect le plus difficile de la creation, je cherche toujours a le simplifier. Helas, mon enthousiasme n'etait que de courte duree. Quand j'ai voulu reproduire sur mon mur de composition ce que j'avais fait sur le logiciel, ca ne donnait pas la meme chose. C'est vrai que je n'avais pas tous les meme tissus, et les peintures que j'avais importees dans le logiel etaients un peu deformees, j'ai relu apres comment il faut faire... Alors j'ai recommence a composer sur le mur. Mais cette fois-ci j'ai pris des photos de beaucoup de compositions differentes, je les ai ensuite mises sur Photoshop ou je les ai recadrees et mises au niveaux gris. Ca m'a enormement facilite le travail. Aussi, je recommencerai avec EQ6 parce que c'est vraiment bien de voir "the big picture", et ne pas se perdre dans les details. J'ai actuellement 3 compos en noir et blanc, je vais en choisir une a executer aujourd'hui.

Where do I go from here?

After coming up with 2 or 3 ink paintings I actually liked, it occurred to me that I had some wonderful Japanese fabrics purchased at the European Patchwork Meeting this year in Alsace, France. http://www.patchwork-europe.com/?lang=en
So, I stuck several pieces up on my kitchen wall and, well... What now? Should I just attack with my rotary, and hope for the best? I do like spontaneity but this seemed a bit reckless. I needed a plan.
I have dozens of quilting books with plans but I didn't want to stay with a traditional quilting design which I find too restrictive. I need freedom and spontaneity with order, my buzzword for the moment. I tend to do work which is very spontaneous but often chaotic, which explains why I often only like small portions of my pieces. So, the never ending question of how to get from A to B arose.

So I decided to get a map, I chose EQ6. http://www.electricquilt.com/ . EQ6 is quilting software which allows all types of quilt design, from traditional to contemporary, from basic coloring in the blocks to design all your own pieces. You can import images as well as your own fabrics. I bought this software about a year ago and did all the tutorials which took about a week. However, when I tried to import my fabrics the results were less than perfect. I think I jumped on to another project at that point and forgot about it. So when I got the book back out I wasn't sure what I could expect. I spent the whole day Friday practicing scanning and importing fabrics which has become easy for me now. The results are fantastic, I can now use all of these images to compose with on my computer screen rather than my kitchen wall. I am able to re size pieces, overlap, adjust value, print, start over, try in purple etc. And I haven't cut into a single piece of fabric yet!

I've included a "rough draft " of my intended composition, there are still some fabric decisions to be made, but basically the composition holds. This was my intention. Once assembled I'll be able to make the fine tuning decisions. I will post the final results this week.

No beginning, no end

There won’t be an official debut to these comments, thoughts, scribbles or whatever. The creative process is an ongoing one and it doesn’t have a beginning or an end, other than the obvious.

After gathering together many of my samples and discovering that I had forgotten how I’d done them because there were so many layers, I decided I should probably start some sort of record keeping other than my sketchbooks. These recordings have that goal in mind. These are not finished works (I have a really hard time with that word), they are explorations in process and technique which hopefully, will lead to some interesting work. I've recently discovered Sennelier Inks which are absolutely luscious and vibrant. They dry to a satin finish depending on the amount of water you use. I've been working on different types of paper, tissue and handmade, as well as Lutradur and fabric. I've been dabbling with oil pastels as well and I like the combination of the two.

A problem I encounter quite frequently in my work is that I only like small pieces of it. This goes for larger as well as smaller works. Examples of this are the two blue images. I prefer the cropped image on the bottom, I find the top one a little busy. So, how do I get from the cropped image into a full-scale piece of work without losing the spontaneity? Blow it up and trace? I think not. I've never had good results with that method. Perhaps getting inspiration from the cropped image and trying again and again. I guess the stitching will wait.

En francais...
Je tente une traduction, je n'aime pas me repeter mais j'en rajouterai. J'ai recemment decouvert les encres Sennelier. Je les adore, elles sont delicieuse. Elles ont un pouvoir colorant exceptionnel et elles sechent avec un aspect satine. Autrefois j'adorais les aquarelles mais j'ai change de cremerie. Depuis 15 jours je travaille avec ces encres et du pastel gras sur des papiers differents, papier de soie et fait main. Un probleme que je rencontre regulierement c'est le cadrage de mon travail. J'ai beau travailler grand ou petit, souvent je n'aime q'une partie de l'oeuvre. Que faire? L'agrandir et perdre la spontaneite? Ou alors prendre la portion recadree et ressayer encore et encore. Pour l'instant la couture attendra.